"And He gave you of all that you asked for, and if you count the Blessings of Allah, never will you be able to count them. Verily! Man is indeed an extreme wrong-doer, - a disbeliever (an extreme ingrate, denies Allah's Blessings by disbelief, and by worshiping others besides Allah, and by disobeying Allah and His Prophet Muhammad PBUH)." 

(Surah Ibrahim, 14:34)

Sunday, 1.12.2013, around 9.30 a.m., the translation of the very ayah was recited by the man at the podium. Among other surah, among other ayah, this very ayah was recited. It meant something, it had to mean something, especially when it was recited in front of more than 400 fresh graduates, dressed in their crisp robe, quirky hood, wearing the ever so famous black-coloured mortar board. We were all in a hall at Taman Tamadun Islam, Sidang Dua, attending UniSZA 5th Convocation Ceremony.

He did not really say much of the ayah, except for reciting it out loud (due to the time constraint I believe). I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself due to the sudden rush of panic attack for I would be the first person, of the first row, to receive the scroll in the morning - and I did not attend the rehearsal held three days before-hand. As I was settling down, I saw the ayah on the screen projected a few yards in front of me, then re-reading it a few times, trying to digest the meaning behind it. Well, it was more than the meaning, it was the reality I was trying to grasp. 

"What am I in this robe is doing here today?" 

"This scroll that I will be receiving, what will be of its use?"

It won't certainly going to be just a fancy paper only to be received after 4 years of study. To call it a hard-work masterpiece would certainly be an extreme hyperbole as too much procrastination, time-wasting, last-minute works of a quality lower than actually to be expected, late class attendances and countless absenteeisms were involved along the process. Nah, I was even one of the latest persons to show up this morning! My heart was filled with shame and disappointment. "Man is indeed an extreme wrong-doer." says the ayah. I was angry at myself. 

Helplessly, I sat there in silence, telling myself what a wonderful feeling it would be if I deserve today. How meaningful it would be if I could reverse the time and make my study years as fruitful as they should have been. How I wish I did not take for granted the time He had given me. How I wish I could really be thankful for the countless blessings of Allah!

"Semoga sijil ini tidak menghumban diriku ke neraka." - Dr. Ustaz Riduan Nor

Time passed, years gone, and only the future is left to be amended. With this scroll in my hand, the greatest most challenging question I am facing right now is, "How can I serve Allah?". 

Temporary world, my destination is still far ahead. And this is just a beginning. 

May Allah accept.

I feel that there's a need for me to fill the blank page over here under two reasons: 1) I've been procrastinating long enough 2) I just feel like writing stuffs, and I'm bored doing my never-ending thesis (that makes it all three - God how I wish I could just fast-forward this troublesome segment of thesis-writing in my life). 

I often wonder how do people around me deal with their own life. My mum for instance, is she happy today? Or is she sad, and why is she so? How is she progressing with her life? What are her everyday difficulties? Up to her age now, did she achieved all her wants in her life? And there is my brother, does he feel satisfied with all the winnings in his online game? What will he do in the future? Is he mad at me today that I blabbered at him yesterday?

And there's me, writing this thing right here. As I typed this, I have these huge number of other thoughts in my mind. Oh look I have to finish the Chapter 2 of my thesis by the end of this week; darn I haven't even do my laundry!; hey why don't I listen to some music right now, I can multi-task what; will this thing I write here benefit anyone?; did I write it well enough?; can I graduate this year?; maybe I should drink more plain water?; and so many other stuffs. By the look of my physical, no one could ever tell what I'm thinking at the moment. People would just pass by me and think of me as another stranger, just a common pedestrian, someone of no importance that they meet in life. And I would look at them and think of them as the same.

The one thing that I often forgot is that, everyone is the same as me. We are human, we have our own struggles and hardships in life. Whoever the person is (e.g. a doctor, a sanitary worker, or even a homeless guy) there must be something difficult that he or she has to deal in life every day. This difficulty could be of anything. It could be that the person I met today at 7E has just experienced a death in his family, or the akak pisang goreng probably just had her finger cut by the knife, or the little kid I bumped into yesterday probably was an orphan.

These people and the hardships they deal in their life, if we never ask them, we'll never know their story. Thus the least thing we can do is to be nice to them. Don't be too quick to jump into judgement on them. And be sure to appreciate them as they are, think of them as the same with us. Just picture ourselves in their shoe, then are we strong enough to deal with their struggles? And their struggles, are they comparable with our own struggles? If not, are we not lucky to not to experience things they have to go through each day?

The Prophet Muhammad (s) said: "Be kind, for whenever kindness becomes part of something, it beautifies it. Whenever it is taken from something, it leaves it tarnished".

I made this poster a year ago for Pak Jamil's Language of Persuasion subject.

This poster has a ridiculous story to be told behind its making: I was having a hard time thinking how would I attract an ant into eating something as I need to capture it doing what it does best. As idiotic as it may sound, I put some rice on a dish because I thought perhaps some ants would circle around the rice and try to lift it...or eat it. In fact, I was relating to some things I learned from matriculation - that white rice has carbs which will be broken down into simple sugar (monosaccharides? sorry rusty chemistry). I mean why wouldn't ants be attracted to sugar? I waited for 2 hours, yet not even an ant came across the dish. I was losing my patience and ranted to my mum about this. She said if she was me, she would have used sugar instead of rice. I was stunned by her statement because I never thought to do so! Realizing what a complete moron I was, I quickly replaced the rice with some drops of sugar, REAL SUGAR, at least, visible to naked eyes. Within 5 minutes later, ants came flooding the area and the photo was successfully captured.

I don't intend to fill this page with another moronic stuffs I did so let's just get to the point: we as human beings shall be grateful for every things in our life, as simple as not to waste food. Food is a rezeki (gifts from Allah The Merciful) to us, thus by any means of wasting them, we are actually showing the act of ungratefulness, as some people out there are dying to get a plate of rice, or even a piece of bread, just to keep them alive for the day. My cousin, a cabin crew, once told me he has seen a mother with her child trying to sell some bananas on an old sampan somewhere in India, sacrificing her life just so she would be able to feed her child a proper meal. While at the shipyard, a group of homeless Indians scavenging their trashes in the ship, found a tin of rotten biscuits and gobble them hungrily.

And then I remember Sanji who would never waste any food because he used to starve to death when he was a child. He used to have a bag full of golds with him that time, but since he was on a island in the vast ocean, he couldn't use those golds to buy a food, and he nearly died of malnutrition.

And then I remember I don't know what will become of me in the hereafter as I'll be questioned upon every pieces of food I've wasted. Allahu a'lam.

Someone shared this on Facebook. It reminds me of Mitch Albom's Tuesdays With Morrie. I think everyone should read it.

An 87-Year-Old College Student Named Rose

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned round to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.

She said, "Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?".

I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant squeeze.

"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?", I asked.

She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, and have a couple of kids...".

"No seriously", I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.

"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!", she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake. We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months, we would leave class together and talk non-stop. I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium.

As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor. Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know".

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, "We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing. There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You have to laugh and find humor every day.

You've got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.

We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it! There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.

If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old.

If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight.

Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding opportunity in change.

Have no regrets.

The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets".

She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose".

She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.

At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago. One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.

Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.

These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.

REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL.

We make a Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.

Right? Me too.

I can never get enough of timelapses. It's awesome to see something we've never seen before, though they are happening all around us every day. Subhana Allah. Here's a good one for you:

Went to visit my oldies (mum's) last week. Healthy and happy they were. I was so glad to see them in such a shape. I was glad that I still have the chance to talk to them. The smiles on their face, they were priceless. And while I was there, I watched this cerekarama (Malay movie) on TV3, something about a son who despised his mum without knowing the actual story of why his mother abandoned him when he was a child. I didn't really pay any attention to it because it was boring, dull and too usual. Yeah sure, all of us have our own stories, our own secrets, I got that. Then I looked at my grandma and grandpa, a struck of thought hit my head - behind those crinkly, aged faces, what were the stories behind them? 

So I had this idea to talk to them about their pasts, which I was quite unsure of, as there were bits of stories told by my mum and aunties here and there - they were disorganised and I had a hard time connecting the storyline. We sat around the dining table having our late supper, and I interviewed my grandpa hehe. This happy-go-lucky jii-chan was born on 1940s, thus he got to experience the Japanese and British invasion. He had a sight-disabled mother named Zainab, a sister named Salmah and a step-father. According to him, he experienced a struggling life back then. Both his mother and sister were deceased due to Malaria plague, which was very hard to cure during those years. Though he had a hard life, he still went to school until Standard 6 or so. He became a begger at 16, and after his mother's death, he began to live on his own. 

He said he used to walked for miles just to get a job. Along the journey before he found a job, bringing a small pot with him, he fed himself by begging for food from the villagers. He then worked as a labour at a military base, under British reign. The British officials treated him well, because my grandpa was a hard worker. After working for the military, he worked with JKR (Public Works Department), until he retired. He was an active person too. He joined body-building championship, plays, sports, and others. 

My grandma on the other hand, had her own story. She had a difficult life too. My late great grandma was a hawker - well, without a stall. She dwelt in the town selling legumes and others. My grandma helped her with that. She was a brilliant student at school. She entered an Islamic school and was able to recite and understood Quran very well, she even taught other students (she is still good at it until now). 

Now, this is the interesting part - she married my grandpa without even knowing who he was. My grandpa's uncle was the match-maker. He urged my grandpa, who originated from Kuala Lumpur, to move to Besut, Terengganu to marry my grandma. After some months being persuaded, he decided to finally move there. They got married, but both of them were still struggling to live.

My grandpa told me that he had to do so many jobs to feed his family - washing the dishes, laundry other people's clothes and iron them, rubber-tapping, etc. etc. until he got to work with JKR. My grandma rented a warong and started her own business. Her children helped her at her warong. When my mum was born (she was the third among her seven siblings), the mid-wife opted to adopt my mum, but my grandma strongly refused to do so. She said to me, even how hard her life might be, she would never ever give her children to other people. Though their life was hard, they sent all of their children to school, because they believed education was extremely important.

From left: 1) My grandpa, my grandpa's kins, & my grandma; 2) Me, aunt (6th), my mum, grandma, aunt (5th), & le cousin at my back; 3) Me & my grandma

Listening to their stories made me realised that I was living a far more comfortable life than they were as a child. Alhamdulillah. Even now, there are many more out there who don't even get a chance to go to school, what more to enter a university. They don't even get proper water and food supply, an Internet access, or a house to live in. Masya Allah, at times I valued these for nothing. Thank you for the reminders, grandpa and grandma. Thank you for your willingness to share your life experiences. Such great inspirations. I hope I can be as strong and determined to live as both of you too. Insya Allah.

An amazing flower timelapse by Katka Pruskova, a professional photographer from Czech Republic. To create this video, she took more than 7100 photos in more than 730 hours.

"The world is pretty and everyone should be quite and enjoy it" - a first grader

It's just 7.45 in the morning and I'm already beat. Doing translation, especially on Physics subject does challenge my mind and body to the fullest. Nevermind the translation, the fact is that, I hate Physics since the first day I learned it (years ago, during secondary school). I still remember, there was once at Matriculation that I came to pass by a Physics Lab, and I saw the students doing their lab practical sitting on the floor, measuring (or investigating, I don't know) some sort of hanging thread from the lab table. That very moment, I grasped by breath, and I felt extremely thankful that I didn't have to ever learn the subject again (hey Physicians, I mean no harm ya know :B).

It might be an interesting subject for some, but for me, I just can't reason myself well, until now, of why I should learn/know the relationship between the amount of water displaced and the pressure of water when the only thing I want to do in life is to enjoy a humble cup of coffee every single morning. Even if I knew/learned about it, it would probably just end up in the lowest level of my brain memory. 

That's why I'm terrible at Physics, and chose to learn Linguistics and Communications instead.

p/s: Is there any school subject that you dislike so much? Why?

Assalamualaikum and hello everyone.

Oh wow I've been away for too long! I finally have the gut to write here after overcoming all the ramblings in my mind. And watching the latest ep. of One Piece. And drinking copious amounts of coffee.

So it's already the 3rd week of 2013. So far so good I guess. Ended my 7th semester recently, a troublesome one of all semesters I've gone through, and pretty much expecting the final exam result (feeling quite negative about the outcomes though). Nonetheless, I'm enjoying my semester holiday.

2012 has been a challenging year for me. It taught me a lot, through it's ups and downs. I'm thankful for every opportunity Allah has granted me with. I'm thankful for every people I've met, every journey I've been through. Life is beautiful that way, isn't it?

This year, 2013, I'll be 23. Lucky number 23 (I really love this number, because it's stated on my birth date), and I will be making some big moves in my life - I know all of us will to. And I pray that Allah will guide me the right path. I want to become a better person, to myself and to the people around me. I want to do more to others, other than myself. There's a saying by Audrey Hepburn, "As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself, the other for helping others".

That's it for now I guess. Although this is a little too late, but happy 2013 everyone! :D